(Update: this blog post was a bad idea. I'm now really sick! I tempted the gods.)
(Note: I am not a medical professional and this is just a joke or something.)
How to Get Over a Cold Really Fast By Artificially Forcing Sleep
The first day you feel the cold coming on, take the day off. (Better to take a full day off work now, than come in sick for two weeks and make your co-workers sick.)
Take a shower and put clean sheets on the bed.
Drink a lot of water and use some Zicam if you have it.
Turn off your phone and go to sleep for as long as you can.
When you wake up, drink some more water and then immediately take an Ambien (or Tylenol PM) even though it's daytime and it feels so wrong to do so.
Try to sleep for as long as possible. Sleep past the point of comfort. Sleep until nightmares occur. Sleep until you can't possibly sleep any more.
Go to bed at the normal time.
Wake up without a cold.
This has worked for me three times!
Ridiculous. Can you do the same thing for death? Like Flatliners, you wake up a whole new you?
Posted by: matt | November 14, 2007 at 11:00 AM
three times?
how often do you get a cold?
:|
j/k
Posted by: Abhi | November 14, 2007 at 11:42 AM
I am incredibly sick and it's partly your fault. Seriously, worse than I've felt in years.
Posted by: Max Silvestri | November 14, 2007 at 12:41 PM
that sounds like the secret I should have heard last week. next time, cold, I'm sleeping you to death!
Posted by: ginevra | November 14, 2007 at 03:48 PM
im sick. i think ill try that.
nighty night!
Posted by: massie | December 17, 2007 at 12:42 PM
this method you told me made me go into surgery i had to remove part of my skull cuz my brain was bulging. i now suffer from chronic eppalepsy .
i will be contacting your home phone iv already set up a court date.
talk to you soon
Posted by: i had to go to the emergency room | January 27, 2008 at 04:13 AM
So what do you do if you cant take a day off from work, where I work they really frown on it and it counts against you as an un excused absence, so what do you do go to work and make everyone else sick.
Posted by: robert | February 02, 2008 at 08:58 PM