Lindsayism.com

Primary Source Library-Based Social Anxiety

From: Lindsay
To: Shaw, Stephanie, Andrew, Travis
Subject: Bookshelf Dysmorphic Disorder
People Who Were Over the Other Night:
I was just looking at my bookshelf because I was bored and noticed that it contains "The Rules" and "He's Just Not That Into You." I would like to explain for any who saw it during the "bookshelf analysis and judgment" portion of the evening that the reason I have those books is because I was writing a book proposal for a parody book a few years ago right after the latter came out, but then abandoned the project because that's what I do with projects.
Kelsey Grammer's autobiography, however, I own in earnest and have read three times.
xo,
Lindsay
ps: this isn't the first time people have come over or anything, I just never looked at my bookshelf in this light before.

background: I have a discriminating palate

ME: btw there was a marketplace segment this morning on npr about how popular rats are becoming in chinese cuisine. I swear to god.
FRIEND:  I love that even the NPR you get is racist.

Jesse Lange for (Junior Class) President!

* I have a huge crush on this 16 year old kid who stands up to Bill O'Reilly. Watch the whole thing. He's like a young Brad Pitt, with balls!! "Rising Junior", indeed!

* (There are) 100 Things Funny (about): The Washlet.  The parody possibilities are endless (and surely forthcoming on Youtube. Off the top: "A Washlet Named Hal".)

* Ritalin Readings is still tomorrow and is still going to be awesome. See below for details. Yay!

Quick!

Vote for my Gawker tshirt slogan before it disappears! (it is: (Full Disclosure: I Know Everyone)) Joke explanation: I hate the full disclosure name drop.

Yeah, this is what I'm caring about right this second.

Nick D'Agosto Joins the Cast of "Heroes"

The guy from Election and The Office continues his meteoric rise:

"The actor will play Claire's boyfriend, West, who is said to have "a very cool superpower."

I bet it's his face! I guess I have to start watching "Heroes." Also, everyone I know who has seen his movie "Rocket Science" (out 8/10) says it's really good.

Earlier: This is Now a Nicholas D'Agosto Fan Site

It's Not the Wayback Machine, It's Time Out New York

This week (as part of what I just learned is an entire issue about hipsters), TONY presents a quiz: are you a hipster? OMG (but before OMG was said all the time)! It mentions Misshapes!! It's so deck! Here are some pitches for future quizzes:

* Are you a hippie or someone over 30 who doesn't smoke grass?
* Are you a flapper or whatever flappers called people who weren't flappers?
* Are you a slave owner, an abolitionist, a slave, a sharecropper, or other?
* Arst thou a witch?
* Do you have the plague or not?
* Do you walk erect?

If someone from Time Out is reading this, call me! There are like, so many other periods in history whose quiz-time has passed besides 2003!

 

separated at the gym

In this poster, Seth Rogan bears a striking resemblance to a certain blogger-columnist-pinup-cohost of Ritalin Readings (Tuesday!). Does he not? Look at those eyes! Okay, it's probably more of a real life thing because I can't find any photos of that particular look, but something after the jump.

does a mathematical property apply to this?

Kittenpants sent me some sad news this morning. But I perked up when I found out about my chances with this guy.

Yes. We are in our thirties.

Worker's doin' it too!
 

I Try To Get A "That's What She Said" Out Of My Friend Gabe, Unsuccessfully

gd: here
gd: http://www.superdeluxe.com/sd/artist/maria_bamford
lindsay: this is too long for me.
gd: haha
gd: fair enough
lindsay: it's just too long.
gd: I SAID FAIR ENOUGH
lindsay: it's really really long.
lindsay: and big.
gd: you are a crap
lindsay: it's a big file
gd: you are a crap of a persoon
lindsay: it's really long and big
lindsay: and hard to watch
gd: you smell bad
lindsay: So to recap: I'm saying it's long, big, and hard.
gd: yeah yeah
gd: you're out!
gd: i'm kicking you out of my band
lindsay: I'm posting this conversation as "I Try To Get a "That's What She Said" Out of My Friend Gabe"
lindsay: "Unsuccessfully"
gd: BOOOO
gd: POST THIS: BOO
lindsay: (I was)
gd: BOO, YOUR BLOG SOCKS
lindsay: I really am
gd: I'M NOT DOING IT
gd: i'm not your chat monkey

He is now.

Also, my blog does "sock."

Related: Gabe is obsessed with socks.

(No offense to Maria Bamford, her video was merely a pawn in my annoying game.)